Desire discrepancy is a set of differences about the quantity, quality, or types of experiences that a couple or a group want to have. So how can we talk about the different ways that two (or more) partners might access sexuality?

What happens when you grow up in a system (i.e. the church) that both refuses to talk with you about sexual health, and also encourages you to avoid having conversations that may result in one of you being angry before you go to bed?

We were thrilled to have Nicki and Stephen Pappas on to talk about what happens when one person in a partnership begins the deconstruction process before the other partner. This can be a really intimidating, vulnerable process for a lot of folks, and Nicki and Stephen talk about their process of simultaneously navigating exploration, discovery, hope, grief, and fear of abandonment.

Sadly, a person's dreams must serve the greater purpose of evangelism. And then when we consider gender, the complications here get worse. Women support the “dreams” of their husbands. Husbands support the “dreams” of the larger church dictated by the pastor and the broader goals of the American Christian church, often supporting white nationalism and other conservative agendas.

Purity Culture isn’t just a collection of pithy quotes and misappropriation of Scripture about bodies and relationships; it’s a myriad of businesses, media, and political systems that work together to showcase and reinforce the existence of particular types of relationships. Our guests, Teddi and Nick from the podcast Oh God I Forgot About That, study cultural and literary artifacts from the 90s and 00s and talk about how each of these got used and enhanced to propagate the larger goals of Purity Culture.